LET'S WORK IT

This piece is written with the objective of shaking and waking our fast slumbering mtv, youtube generation and to encourage those of us not sleeping on our oars to keep it up and do more. This is because the youth stage is our best formative years, a time of experimenting, discovering and preparation. A time to plan for failure to plan is a plan on itself, to fail. It is a time we have to mould whatever shape we desire for our future, because the youth of any country is the future of that country. So the kind of youth we produce today will determine the kind of future we have as humans. Let me put this in another way; the kind of youth we are today determines what we will be tomorrow.

The dictionary definition for work most suitable for this piece is: “the use of physical strength or mental power in order to do or make something”, this can include a job, household chores, school, or personal projects. Your work or what you do defines you, gives you content, quality your personality and helps in charting a course for your life. To some extent, it gives us a way of life, and sometimes, purpose. But at just the mention of the word some people, especially teens and young people, cower, cringe and/or quiver. To these people, it connotes a punishment of some sort, an intrusion into a perfect easygoing lifestyle. It sounds to them like an adult word created for the sole purpose of turning ‘normal’ people away from enjoying life.

Now, because of the mass of information at our disposal and the technology available to us in this day and age, our generation should be trailblazers, forerunners, and people breaking old records, creating new ones and generally making things happen. But no. instead we suddenly have a generation that abhors hard work or any form of work for that matter. A generation that just wants things handed to them on a silver platter. That wants the normal standards of doing things lowered for their sakes because they say, “it’s too difficult, we can not….” That have made laziness their watchword and the order of the day and so have become too lazy to even lift a finger to work but prefer to lazy about all day everyday watching cable TV, playing video games or wandering aimlessly at the mall.

While it is true that some are born with the proverbial silver spoon in their mouths, and some, yet, probably with wooden or earthen spoons, work is still needed at various points in life especially if you want to be a responsible person or be seen as one. Imagine you have the entire Bill Gates fortune handed over to you; you will lose it all eventually if you are lazy.

Let’s not deceive one another. Nothing good ever comes easy. Who has ever achieved any real, tangible and lasting thing without working hard at it? If we really want to be good at what we do; if our desire is to succeed in our individual endeavours and not always throwing in the towel each something “difficult” comes up; if we must leave this world just a little better than we met it, then we need to work very hard at it , and then some. As far as we are physically and mentally fit, bending our backs to do some sort of work won’t kill anyone (has never). Ask any successful person on our planet today- be it an entrepreneur, entertainer, scholar, athlete, politician, etc- and they will tell you the same thing, “success can only come with hard work”. We must pay the price for success, put in that extra hour, that extra effort and pick up some friendly Ds- diligence, discipline, dedication and devotion. We must shed some of that unnecessary comfort, there will time for that, I guarantee you.

So, let’s work it.

ENJOYING A HOBBY

Hello readers. Just feel like sharing a thought today. I just finished reading this book "men are from Mars, women are from Venus” by John Gray. Quite an interesting read. You know, one goes through live thinking, ‘I know this, I know that’ but end up not knowing much and not really enjoying much from this beautiful earth. Maybe it’s because people are just so afraid of change so they remain where they are instead of going for knowledge that will improve their lives. Knowledge is power, and the more you acquire it, the more powerful one becomes. I enjoy reading. Whenever I can lay my hands on something good, I go for it, and am not just referring only to the news. Books can really empower you. Start reading today, if you are not already.

Be blessed

FORGIVENESS

Ever wondered why the saying, “to err is human, to forgive divine”? It is because forgiveness is hard work. Forgiveness is never easy, especially if a loved one is not the source of the hurt. Seriously. Sometimes we have to muster all the inner strength we possess, and then some, just to forgive, and most of the time it feels like we are being unfairly treated. Like we are unfairly or unjustly asked to give more than is necessarily required.

One sure fine quality that humans DON’T possess is infallibility. I am yet to come across one that is so perfect he/she does not make mistakes. Have you? Mistakes, as a matter of fact, are what make us human. We learn from mistakes, grow from mistakes. We become more productive, more effective and efficient. We become better people, humans, better society(ies). “Yeah, yeah! Sure, sure!” I hear someone say. “Easy for you to say when you are not the direct recipient of someone’s huge mistake”. Not true. I’ve been there. I know the feeling. I have forgiven and I have been forgiven. What about you, can you truly say that you have never made a mistake, or hurt anyone because of a mistake you made? Can you truly say that you’ve never been forgiven by someone? Ever?

Forgiveness is a self conscious act. It is done willingly. Freely given, freely accepted. Forgiveness does not have to be sweet at first, but it does have its rewards both to the giver and the receiver. Forgiveness releases us from the captivity of hatred. It is like a seed planted that bears more fruits. That means, the more you forgive, the more you are forgiven. A get-out-of-jail-free-card, if you will.

Forgiveness is like pouring cold water on a seething hurt. It renews and strengthens ties, provides a platform for a fresh start and hope for the future. Forgiveness is a test of our maturity, an opportunity to express the image and likeness of God in us. To the person that forgive, each time we forgive someone (or people), a refreshing feeling comes over us. We start a process that ends up ridding our system of the hurt. That is God healing our hurt. Hurt that will otherwise remain and deteriorate and degenerate into something far worse (anger, depression, hatred). Those who understand this take an extra step, walk up to the person and say, “I forgive you. Even though am hurting, badly right now, still I forgive you”

To forgive makes one come out as the better man in a tensed and awkward situation where some people would rather have a brawl, or carry a 15 year old malice that will cause more damage in the long run than necessary. We all need to forgive no matter how hard or painful it may seem because we are not only doing ourselves good, but we will be contributing to healing the world.

I choose to forgive. What about you?

DATING

Dating. Harry meets Sally; they fall in love, get married and live happily ever after. Classic. Oh! I forgot the part with the bunch of kids running all over the place and literally tearing the whole house apart. No wait, it’s that cheaper by the dozen movie. Anyways, Hollywood has spawn out an uncountable number of such stories and has made trillions of dollars from them. Different variations, each time with just the right twist for the right season-be it winter, summer, Christmas, New Year, or whatever-but still the same old story.

Dating. Opposites definitely attract. Its one of those things that MUST happen so that this our very beautiful, attractive, swimsuit model of a world can keep on spinning on her ‘catwalk’. Attraction is the reason dating happens. It may be physical, i.e. caused by beauty, money, style, fame, power, or generally things we can see or hear, although most people can translate this to mean lust (opinions are free). It could also be chemical, in other words, we don’t know why a pull towards a certain something or someone, all we know is that there is a definite pull and most of the time there is little or nothing we can do about it. Either of the two types of attractions could be motivated by the need for comforting, security and companionship, or by greed, lust, pity, etc.

Detour. Please come along. Christians are followers of Jesus Christ, the Son of the Most High God, second in the Trinity that died on the cross of Calvary to redeem every “lost soul”- who is willing- back to the Father, first of course in the Trinity. So, by simply confessing Christ as your Lord and personal saviour and getting baptized both by water and the Holy Spirit (John 3 vs. 5), the holy Spirit, third in the Trinity, comes and dwells in you, (John 14 vs. 16 & 17), acting as a continuous live link with divinity so that you can always access heaven and never be alone. He becomes your comforter, guide and will teach you all you need to know, if you let Him (John 14 vs. 26)

Dating. We are back. Dating is good and it is recommended by experts (both in the circular and in the Christian community) as a pre-requisite to marriage. Which means dating should lead to marriage, an institution in Christianity considered honourable and sacred. A period where a man and/or woman picks a mate, go out on a date, or a couple of dates, then decides he/she is the most suitable partner. For live. But, many people enter into dating with a preconceived notion of what dating should be like, for them, or they may have a set of criteria or things they are looking for in a mate and when they don’t see it, its bye bye and off to the next ‘mark’. This makes dating a selection process by elimination, trial and error if you will, without knowing how many times the process will be repeated before becoming successful.

For many in the dating game, the thrill of the chase is all they are after without any actual intention of marriage so they just go on and on bulldozing people’s hearts and feelings as they go. This then creates another group of individuals who are at the business end of the gun and end up with the heartbreaks, exhaustions, frustrations and hurt. Another down turn to dating is the fact that people are normally at their best behaviours during dating (and even in courtship). Don’t you agree? These people can carry on a pretence or a false notion for the entire period of dating just to lure the other party to the alter. Little wonder then people wake up one morning three years after the thrills and glitz of honeymoon has passed or the pretence has either worn out or is discovered and go, “oh my God, what have done now?”

Now please don’t get me wrong. I am not against dating neither Am I promoting a cause against it (although it does seem so, but not). As a matter of fact, dating has helped a lot of people find fulfillment in their marital pursuit, and still is. For many, there is just nothing else to turn to. But at such a time when the divorce rate has gone through the roof and marriages are failing left, right and center, there simply has to be other and better options for people seeking to preserve the beauty and sanctity of the marriage institution. There just has to be. Even arranged marriages are an option. Now wait just a minute, if it worked (and wonderfully well too) for our fathers and forefathers, we only need to know why and how, then apply it and see it working for us too- maybe even better.

Don’t quit yet neither let what has happened so far stop you from finding and enjoy good quality relationship. And if you are new at this you don’t have to go through all that pain and rejection. There is another better option. It is definitely worth the try and has a 100% guarantee of success. Finding a suitable mate to spend your live with does not have to be frustrating, exhausting and heartbreaking. It does not have to be a game of chance, or trial and error. Let it be something you can trust in. Something that leave you truly satisfied and not feeling used and dumped. Do I have your attention yet? Jesus said, “He that is born of the spirit is spirit, and he that is born of the flesh is flesh”
The other option? Spend time with the teacher, the comforter, and the guide. Fellowship with the Holy Spirit. Spend time in His presence. Ask him and He will tell you what and who. He cannot lead you astray. Remember, He is the guide, the teacher. He will direct you. He will lead you. If you are sincere and serious when the right person comes along he will tell you and you will know. Believe me, I know.

Don’t keep this to yourself alone. Share it with someone. Spread the word.

Stay blessed

HANDLING HURT

How we handle hurt can determine to a great extent how far we go in live (and how fast too), this is because hurt is a negative emotion that robs us of our best if not put in check very well. Hurt can come in one or some of the following ways:

• When we grief or loose someone or something, like a loved one, a pet, property, possession, business or job.
  
• It is very easy to get one’s feeling hurt when people (bosses, spouses, friends, etc) talk down to us or are rude and impolite to us especially when we are less deserving of such attitude. When people embarrass us in public or front of people we care about, that too can be hurtful.
  
• Physical pains, accidents, sickness and diseases can cause a whole lot of hurt to the direct recipient of the pain and to their loved ones.
  
• Betrayal and disappointments can also steer up hurt in people, either caused by others or in a more destructive form when it’s perceived to come from oneself. Like when we make mistakes that we think it’s irreparable. When we fail at an Endeavour or in reaching a target or a goal we set (or others set for us), but just know that your Betrayal from someone you love, trust or care about is pretty heavy stuff.
  
• I once heard a wise man say, “You become the environment you continuously live or find yourself in”. Hurt is contagious (so is love, peace, success, wisdom, joy, etc). When you find yourself continuously around hurt, you slowly but surely get infected. One then becomes disoriented, get angry at and avoid people, and for what? No good reason. Some bad exist who take pleasure (because they have nothing better to do with their lives) telling and spreading malicious lies and rumours. These people are talebearers and can separate best friends and should be avoided like plagues.

Anybody and everybody can feel hurt. This is because we are all generally spirit beings with souls and inhabiting a physical body (sort of a three in one, if you like) the soul part of us is responsible for our emotions which are gifts given to us to enable us live in this beautiful yet imperfect world. So everybody hurt. However, some hurt more than others because hurt can be handled.

What Hurt Can Do

Hurt is mostly destructive because it cloud judgments and cause people to think and act from emotion, throwing caution out of the window, while concentrating on massaging their ego and less on consequences and future outcomes (picture this: a man gets hurt at work, gets angry and quits his well paying job, then goes home to a wife, five children, two dogs, a pet snake and pile of bills). Maybe you think this is a bit extreme, but you would be shocked to find such things happen all the time.

Hurt can and does paralyze the mind and puts one in a state of inaction and leaves the person merely surviving and not living. In such a state, if not checked and arrested can lead to hopelessness, despair, despondency, then depression. It is usually easy then to turn to drugs, alcohol, substance abuse, overeating, prostitution, etc.

Hurting people are often times resentful of others. They easily blame people for their predicament so may target their hurt at others. Since they care less about what they say or do, they tend to become hurtful and mostly to those who care about them the most.

Destinies can be lost through continuous expression of hurt. Relationships are endangered, battered, some lost. Likewise, jobs, marriages, opportunities, sound mind and sound health. So please don't waste a second more on hurt. take a deep breath and move on

How Not To Handle Hurt

1. Don't take it out on the person that hurt you, or on others who don’t even have anything remotely to do with the hurt.
   
2. Don't pretend you are not hurt and living in denial or turning the hurt inwards.
   
3. Don't stop trusting people because you think they might just hurt you again.
   
4. Don't stop believing in people or God

Right Ways to Handle Hurt

• Share it with someone whom you know can help, but telling everyone about it only deepens the wound and keeps it fresh.
  
• Learn to master your emotions. Practice some self control. Remember, whatever you don’t master ultimately becomes your master.
  
• The past can serve as a sort of guide, but dwelling in it gets one stuck in a place. Know that, so long as your hands are holding onto your past you cannot hold your future, and your future cannot be better than your past until you let go of the past. Let go.
  
• Do not make excuses or try to explain why you should be hurt. Just let go.
  Try some positive thinking. Don’t always imagine that the whole world is out to get you. Not true. Instead see what good can possibly come out it. There is always opportunity in every difficulty if only we look more closely.
  
• Put your faith into good use. Usually, it is not the problem that matters, neither the situation nor the circumstance, but really how you handle it.
  
• Overcome evil with good. No point going about hating people or trying to take out revenge. The time spent going backwards could be used to accomplish a lot of good.
  
• Try not to act on out your emotion. Do what is right not what you feel like doing.
  
• Locate an environment of happy people and spend time tere regularly. Attending church services, take a stroll in the park park with someone you love, read a good book or listen to soul lifting songs.
  
• Turn to God for healing. He provides an unmatched supernatural healing that leaves you peacefu

Stay blessed

SUCCESS

Different people, depending on their perception, social status and literacy level at the time will give you very varying definitions and views on success. Lots of “quick ways to”, ways to becoming… books have been written on the subject (and many are very helpful too). Some people will tell you it is a state of happiness, or satisfaction, or contentment. Others will say it is having a good relationship with your spouse and children. Yet some are sure it is when your relationship with God is intact.

In most parts of the world and in many cultures, success is regarded as gathering, acquiring, or accumulating great wealth, power and/or fame. Well, that is not entirely wrong neither is it also entirely accurate. Reason? Power, wealth or fame are not evil or bad by themselves. They are actually gifts from God (Deuteronomy 28:1-13, James 1:17). They are given to meet specific needs and solve specific lives’ problems. So, there is the very possibility that you may require one or all of the three to achieve your given purpose. And again, in the pursuance of your live purpose, there is every likelihood that you will be amply rewarded with wealth, power and/or fame, either as an encouragement or a “well-done” gift especially when you record excellent results. Remember, our God seriously rewards them that diligently seek Him. In any case they cannot be withheld from you when it is due time. The problem with us humans is that in trying to be smarter than God, we often put the cart before the horse and go after them wrongly.

What then is success? Success is attaining peace and fulfillment through identifying your God given purpose in live(which most of the time is different from that of the man next door), giving it all it takes and requires and in the process producing healthy and quality long lasting fruits without compromising: 1) your relationship with your family(because they are you first and foremost responsibility here on earth), 2) your health (dead men don’t work), 3) your integrity(which is your guiding principle and the pillar of your success), and lastly 4) your relationship and standing with God (because He gave you the success in the first place and may He not take it back).

True success is never a walk in the park, not even when you seem to have reached the pinnacle (as a matter of fact, success is harder to sustain than to obtain). It is not for the chicken-hearted because it requires strength (both inner and physical), hard work and all the discipline, dedication and diligence you can muster for you will definitely encounter some pitfalls now and again on the path. Sometimes enough to discourage us or even cause us to do a ‘180’, but they are only mostly a test of our patience, endurance, courage, determination and wisdom that will invariably boost and polish our success.

Success does not necessarily mean that one has reached the end of the journey. For someone who has a range of goals (either short or long term), the attainment of each goal is a success on its own. Success is also not a shot in the dark nor an instant thing; it requires diligence and making the right choices. Like one author puts it, “we have learned long ago that most successful people rarely get to where they want to go by making radical 90- or 180- degree change. Rather, they take one simple step after another in the right direction, make minor course adjustments over time, institute small changes, and follow a series of less-than-earth-shattering decisions. And it all starts with a few small choices made in the right direction” (Jerry Foster, 2004).

True success is very rewarding. Along with it comes peace, fulfillment, satisfaction, contentment and joy (not just happiness), and can only be attained in the pursuit of one’s life purpose. This is because life without purpose- no matter how much wealth, power and fame is accumulated will invariably lead to work, sweat, toiling and frustration without any meaningful effectiveness or satisfaction.

Tips to Success
1. discover/identify your purpose in life
2. give it all it takes
3. be focused, dedicated, disciplined, and diligent
4. learn more about it(get a cert, a degree, read books)
5. avoid distractions
6. be optimistic
7. enjoy doing it, and finally
8. have faith in God

BE INSPIRED

Our parents can inspire us to greatness, likewise teachers, coaches, politicians, literary minds and men of God. We can be inspired by nature, events or situations. We can also be inspired by a great piece of writing, a book (e.g., the bible), a speech, or a great work of art (Sistine chapel). We can be inspired by technology, architecture, religion, music or sport. We can be inspired by love, beauty, decadence, or even an ugly situation. We can be inspired by God and His attributes.

Some writers have been known to go away to a quite and lonely cabin in the woods, or a secluded place while working on a piece or a book because of the inspiration they get from nature and the environs. Some people have pictures of other people, places or things that inspire them hung their walls for continuous daily inspiration, while others listen to music, speeches, messages, or sermons of their heroes.

Brilliant, wise and talented people change time and the course of history. They are also currently in great demand. The truth is that many of us have the seed of greatness embedded deeply in our DNA just waiting for the right climate for it to sprout to live. No matter how great our gifts and talents might sometimes be, they become a waste if we do not try to be our best at it or at least use it. The use of our talents should first affect us, the owner and leave us better than we are, else we will not be able to impact others anyways.

So there, being our best can be a tricky thing if we don’t enjoy it, trying to have a little fun at something while aiming for the stars can be an even trickier feat to attain. Hence, the need for inspiration, because until we learn to enjoy using our talents we may never get the best out of them. Whatever we do on earth we need inspiration to do it well or to sustain it if we are already good at it.

The world needs more good people, more heroes and heroines. Be inspired. Come out of your shell, your cocoon. Arise and let your light shine on this bleak world. Be inspired. You are the next hero/heroine the world is waiting for. Be inspired. Don’t let negativity, your environment, ridicule, shame, criticism, poverty, loneliness, rejection or hurt hold you back. Be inspired. Know that you have what it takes and don’t let anyone tell you otherwise. Be inspired. Look for inspiration, something/anything to inspire you. They are all around us, in school, church, on the bus, on T.V, even in that boot camp.

Be inspired. It is the only sure way you can become an inspiration for someone tomorrow

Stay blessed